My mom, Jacinta Ramayah


“I know how to do anything – I'm a mom” - Roseanne Barr 

That statement best describes my mom. 
She does know how to do everything.
She's our MacGyver, Mac, Richard Dean Anderson 
the one who comes up with innovative ideas in fixing things at our home. If the neighbor's cat is driving her mad by sneaking into our compound and constantly attacking her plants and shoes, she comes up with a plan to foil that darn cat, armed with a metal fence, some flowers and a stapler. 

Arrangement, Wedding, BouquetShe's already making plans to decorate the house with a flower arrangement that will line the patio (I think it was something like that, I spaced out when the discussion got too technical (I should say too creative) for my brain to comprehend), for my sister's engagement event, which is like months away (right??) 

She's the one we run to, screaming as if we had the devil at our back, when we see a centipede and don't know what the heck to do with it ("just crush it with your bathroom slippers", she says matter of factly, like it's such a simple thing to do, while we look at her in horror. 
CRUSH. IT. WITH. OUR. BATHROOM. SLIPPERS! 
FAINT"Photobucket" "Animated" "Gif" "Faint" "Fainting" "Shocked"). 

In my mind, I can picture her resume looking something like this:
Name : Jacinta Ramayah
Experience :  
1. Mother (1979 – present)
2. Retired Senior Assistant/Teacher
Skills :
1. Storyteller. She used to weave exciting stories for us; she still does actually (though nowadays I'm fully glued to my computer and don't really pay much attention)Photobucket "Sorry" "Smiley" "animated" "cute" "gif".

2. Baker. Even difficult to do doll cakes like this. Yeah, she actually did this cake, on her own, armed with a recipe book, lots of flour and butter and... and.... and.... hmm.. you know... cake stuff.

3. Walking Encyclopedia and Dictionary. Her favorite hobby is reading the dictionary (looking up words for Scrabble, so she says), so she knows most of the words in the dictionary. "Walking Dictionary", was the moniker given by
her colleagues in the school she used to teach and it describes her to perfection. She does know everything!

So nowadays, I don't need to read the newspaper as she will tell me all the latest happenings and events. Earthquakes. Floods. Murders. You name it! Since her History and Geography knowledge is out of this world (she has practically 
"Mountains" "3D" "Wallpaper" "Beautiful" "Scenic" "Visual Paradox"
memorized the entire World Map and knows every valley, mountain, river and can name places, I never even knew existed) so anything we don't know, we just turn to her and she will gladly give us a History or Geography lesson then and there. The best part is she makes it into a delightful story and not some boring lesson, that can make you slip into a coma.  

She even knows all the latest happenings in Hollywood, which leads to some arguments when we disagree with her on certain facts. Thank Goodness for the invention of the Internet, for when we tell her that her facts are wrong, she will say “WAIT!” then goes to the computer  Photobucket computer typing smiley cute funny  and Googles it (we really need to get her a blackberry), then points at her findings and says “See! I told you!”. 
(Moral of the story : Never have a facts related argument with your mom, because most of the time, she's right and you're so dead wrong!) 

4. Censorship Board. She was the strictest of the strictest Censorship Board, never allowing me to read Mills & Boons or Sidney Sheldon till I was 18. 
April Lady, Books

I was only allowed to read Georgette Heyer as Heyer's books were clean and “did not have any descriptive scenes”, my mom's favorite phrase to describe the love scenes in books. When I hit 18, I excitedly read my first Mills & Boons and to my dismay, found it to be boring as hell. So yeah, with my imaginary tail between my legs, I went back to Georgette Heyer, totally repentant. I guess a mother knows best. She instinctively knew that romance books were not to her (spinster for life/nun) daughter's taste.

But it was from her that I inherited my love for books and now when we go on holidays, the first place we look for and our first stop (to the horror of my siblings) is the bookshop and if we find one having a sale, our trip is complete. Heck. Our life is complete. We'll spend the whole day at that bookshop (even through all the dirty looks "mad", "dirty looks", and grumbling sent our way by my siblings. But then again, it is due to love for our mother that they're willing to wait patiently albeit begrudgingly while their mother and oldest sister shop books to their hearts' content). Most of the time during holidays, all our shopping budget will be spent on books (who needs a skirt or shirt, right? Ok. My colleagues will be like "Oh no wonder she wears the same shirt and skirt every week; her money is spent on books!" You're so right, peeps!)

5. Oldies Promoter. She introduced us to the Oldies. Singers, some people would probably go "WHO?". Which is why, I was the odd one out in school, with my oldies instead of the latest boybands (No regrets there. I would rather hear “The Young Ones” instead of “Step by Step”). She introduced us to movies, actually more like forced us to watch all those old movies, like "The Scarlet Pimpernel", “The Champ”, “To Sir with Love” and many others, which we were pleasantly surprised to find were actually good and enjoyable, though we would never admit it to her. Never admit it to her, face to face, I mean (Cue : Evil grin).

Cliff Richard AlbumHowever, we were not full converts. Cliff Richard, Elvis Presley, Bee Gees and the Everly Brothers, we could handle and still do enjoy listening to them but we drew the line at Jim Reeves and Harry Belafonte (we would rather eat chalk. No offense to them. Maybe they work more for the DNA of those born in 
"Rock Smiley" "Rock and Roll Smiley" "Smiley" "Rockin Smiley" "Peace Smiley"the 50s. We are more of the Rock and Roll  
generation). 

6. Poet. She can write a poem in 1o minutes and these are not just any one stanza poems, they actually rhyme and all and most of the time, a dictionary is needed in comprehending the vocabulary in these poems.

Quill, poetry
Some of the poems she has written has even been used in general websites (with acknowledgment to her) 

and she has won poetry writing competitions. At Voicesnet.com, she has a group of friends, whom she treasures, showering her with praise on the poems she has written. So that means, I guess, she must be good at it. Being an undutiful daughter, most of the time she has to force me to read those poems, as I tell her, "poetry ain't my thing", while I secretly admire her and wish I had her skills and when she writes poems specially dedicated to us kids, we're thrilled beyond words. 

7. Rockstar. She's the Rockstar mom who enjoys all the latest movies and songs with us, who even goes to concerts with us. We have pleasant childhood memories of Monopoly and Poker Photobucket gif animated smiley game nights but when it comes to Scrabble, we always say “ESCAPE!” when she brings out her scrabble board as she always ends up playing scrabble with herself. 

Herself, you might wonder. That is what it is called when you end up making up the words for your children so that they can get 50 points instead of the measly 5 points they were going for with the word “the”. Her excuse when we complain "let us make our own words while you handle your words" is “But you're wasting that triple word score!”. 

She's the computer games expert, shocking my brother once when he got up at 3am to see her in front of the computer, her eyes glued to the screen and her mind in full "whistling" "Mickey Mouse" "Cartoon"concentration of the Zuma game. She's an awesome whistler, having whistling competitions with my brother, while my sister and I look at them with envy, wishing we too could whistle.

8. Chef. My mom loves cooking and comes up with interesting restaurant-worthy cuisines to the delight of her children and sometimes their friends. Which is why, her children can only lose weight when they leave home (I agree with you, I SO need to leave home!). She loves cooking for her younger brothers' (Uncle Majilla and Uncle Jude) family. Delighting in throwing parties, cooking and sending dishes over to them. 
For Christmas Photobucket, gif, "Season's Greetings"last year, she spent the whole month, thinking of thePhotobucket "animated" "Santa" "Ho Ho Ho" Christmas Eve meal she was planning to prepare for family and friends. She was looking forward to her youngest brother, Uncle Jude's children coming over for Christmas as she knew his children would love to participate in the whole cooking process. I guess we're too grown up for her and we don't get excited over cooking and baking as we used to when we were young and since we haven't given her any grandchildren (not planning to do anything about this... like ever..), the pleasure her young niece and nephews have for her cooking, especially in wanting to get involved in the cooking process, fills her with pleasure. That is essentially the type of person she is, gaining pleasure not from accumulating accolades but from doing simple things to make her family and friends happy.


“[A] mother is one to whom you hurry when you are troubled.” - Emily Dickinson 

When we were in school and the math questions were turning us into brain dead zombiesPhotobucket, our mom is the one we hurried to. She will look at the math question and tell us gleefully, “I LOVE MATH!” and promptly solve the question for us. Her favorite subjects were Geography, Mathematics, History, heck, I think every subject was her favorite. 

“I love school” is her catch-phrase. Some of you might have heart palpitations (like ME!) with this statement but my mom did literally love school. I am not sure if she was saying this to her children as a form of psychology manipulation that moms are gifted with, hoping to get us children interested in studying (yeah. It didn't work!) or if she really meant it.
 
However, I remember our grandmother telling us with pride that when my mom was younger, she was never away from her books. Even when she was eating, she had the book on the table, in front of her. When we asked my mom to explain herself and this anomaly, her reply was “Eating was boring, so at least with a book, it was less boring”. That is our mom. She never missed a day of school, crying miserably, the one time she was sick and had to cut school (so said my grandmother). 

Which is why, I guess, she reacts with horror Photobucket "React with horror" "Surprised" "animated" "gif"anytime we tell her we want to take a day off from school or work. The expression on her face is like we just told her “Mama, I just killed a man, Put a gun against his head, pulled my trigger now he's dead” (Yeah I was just listening to Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody” performed by Adam Lambert while writing this.... so yeah..... now you know. TMI? Yeah. My blog posts are filled with TMIs.)

With someone who loves school so much, is it any wonder she became a teacher. For 35 years, 10 years of that, teaching the hearing-impaired students. The best thing is that years later, many of her students, who now have children of their own, still remember her. The guy at the bank. The lady at the hospital. All having the courtesy to acknowledge her and wish her well. The burger guy calls her "Teacher" and says he will do the burger "Special" only for her. 
"char kway teow" "delicious" "Malaysian food" "Chinese"
The kway teow guy in the midst of frying the kway teow, reminisces on some of her teaching techniques. "Some of the best English lessons ever!", he vehemently says. 


However, for her, the best time she ever had was teaching the hearing-impaired students. They had no pretense, always honest to a fault, telling it as it is. If they like you, they like you. If they don't, then heaven help you. Years after she has taught them, they have never forgotten her. Sending her wedding invitations. Taking the trouble to visit her, 20 years after she had taught them. Screaming “Teacher” loudly from across the road (they cannot hear so they do not realize how loud their screams are), sometimes causing massive jams but definitely touching our hearts when they tell her in their own language, the sign language, how much they miss her. I don't remember my teachers in school (some I don't even want to remember. shudder) so I will never think of acknowledging any I meet on the street, except for one or two, I guess, 
but for my mom's students to actually acknowledge her, more than 20, 30 years after she has taught 
"Erupting" "Volcano" "Visual Paradox" "3D"them is a testament of the impact she made on them.

She definitely enjoyed teaching and was a good teacher. Working late into the night to come up with teaching aids to make her lesson interesting as well as get her information across. Charts, graphs even creating a volcano for her Geography lesson. 
"Delicious" "Tasty" "Chicken Club Sandwich"
Buying bread, eggs, tuna and so on to make sandwiches with her students for her English class lesson and recording songs to be used during her English lesson on Grammar.


"A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie." - Tenneva Jordan 

Our mom willingly sacrifices anything for those she loves. She gave up an offer to do her Form 6 in College, as she needed to start working and support her mom and younger siblings. Then after getting her hearing-impaired teaching certificate qualifications, she was offered the chance to do her degree but she rejected the offer as it 
"Cute Kitten" "Kitty" "Kitten" "Cute" "Adorable" "I miss you gif"
would take 2 years and we, her young kids at home, were missing her terribly. Heck. Even now, when she's away from home, we're like a cat, who has lost its tail (I seriously don't know how I come up with these comparisons; they don't make sense to me either), going about life aimlessly, missing her terribly.

With no transportation when we were young, she used to walk for miles and miles. Carrying me in one arm, while she was pregnant with my sister, walking to her hospital appointment. When she was pregnant with my brother at 36, she used to walk to my grandmother's house then from there, catch the bus for church. Which is why for her, the car 
Proton
is the greatest invention on the planet and the thought that she now owns her own car and has the ability to drive it anywhere she wants, is joy beyond words. When she sees strangers waiting at the bus-stop, especially if they are going to the hospital, she stops and gives them a lift, no matter how far the place is, saying "I know what it is like not to have your own transport".

When she was diagnosed with cancer, instead of lamenting and bemoaning her fate, she took it all in stride and spent her time comforting us, downplaying the situation so we won't worry. For us kids, she's a superhero. A supermom, going for her "Chemo drugs" "medicine"chemotherapy, then instead of lying prostrate in bed recovering from the torturous, nausea-inducing chemo regiment, she would finish her chemo treatment, then come home and see to the needs of her ailing 88-year old mother. She never felt any anger towards her siblings for not offering to take care of their mother while she completes her chemotherapy. All she had to say to us is "It's fine. I can do it. I'm still ok. It's just chemo. It's not that bad". 

When she begged her sister to take care of her mother for a month while she goes through radiotherapy and her sister slammed the phone down on her saying "It's your duty!", she just shrugged it off and said "It's ok. My sister must be having a bad day. Can you children take care of your 
grandmother while I go away for a month for my radiotherapy?". Not realizing, we, her children, loved her deeply and would do anything for her (you know, the whole catch a grenade for her, kinda of thing).

She took care of her mother-in-law for my father and now she takes care of her mother. Doing it with a smile even though hitting 90 now, my grandmother can be difficult sometimes. When my grandmother throws a tantrum as she tends to do, a lot, my mom remembers the good times when my grandmother was at her prime.

She is the forgive and forget kinda of person. We are the ones who are ready to make war with people who treat her like crap (along the lines of "I'm gonna give them a piece of my mind, punch them in their face" http://zaazu.com "Punching" "Smiley" "Punch in the face" "Knockout" "Animated Smiley". I've always been a peaceful girl but some people just bring out the blood lust in me).

Some people have always been there for my mother. I remember my father's sister, Aunty Loga, who wept during my mother's cancer treatment, saying "She took care of my mother not like a daughter-in-law but like a daughter, bathing my mother, feeding her, now that she's sick, there's nothing I can do for her". My aunt wanted to stay and take care of my mom after my 
"chemo"
mom's surgery and during her chemo, but thought it would be more of a bother instead of help and so refrained. However, for us, it's the thought that counts and we're grateful for that. My father's siblings took the trouble to catch the bus and come all the way to be there for my mom during her surgery, calling almost every day for an update on the progress of her health during her chemo. Then there's Aunty Sundari, my mom's younger brother's wife, who is always there to lend a ear to my mom's frustration when the burden of solely caring for my grandmother gets too much.

So that is why our mom is our inspiration. I know I cannot be like her. I cannot easily forgive and forget and when it comes to my mom, you mess with her and I will hold a grudge against you for the rest of my life. No forgiveness or nice words for you, buster! You can smile and spew sweet words but hatred will be all I feel. I don't think I'm a quarrelsome person, but when it comes to my mom,  I am 
"Slay the dragon" "Dragon Slayer" "Wallpaper" "Medieval Graphic"
always ready for battle (Slay the dragon kind of battle! YEAH!) On the other hand, you do a good deed or have some kind words for my mom, and you will have my eternal and undying gratitude.

My mom inspires me with her strength and perseverance. No matter what difficulties she faces or what obstacles are thrown her way, she is never disheartened but faces everything with optimism and cheerfulness. She has an enduring faith in God, never blaming Him for her misfortunes and illness but thanking Him when she is blessed with good fortune. She has a kind heart, always ready to help her family, friends and even strangers she meets on the street.   


My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.” - Mark Twain 

We are not the greatest of children (I wonder if my siblings will be rolling their eyes and saying “Speak for yourself!”) but we do strive to make her proud. We haven't really achieved anything pride-worthy (I know I haven't) but we hope deep down, she is happy and proud of us (and doesn't wish she had some other children as her own..)

Photobucket "Confess" "Apologize" "Sorry" "Smiley" "Animated" "gif" "guilty" "Did something wrong" "Sorry Ma"We are the type of children, who even though we know we have done something wrong, we will still not be able to keep anything from our mom. We'll confess our deepest darkest secret to her, fully expecting a scolding but just relieved to get it out in the open. 


I am not perfect and tend to sometimes say hurtful things I don't mean but I hope my mom realizes that she will always be the most important thing in my life and whatever I say or do is done out of love. 


“God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers.” - Jewish Proverb 

I do not know how my mom feels about me but I know I'm truly blessed to have her as my mother.


The greatest blessing in the world is to have a mother who's your best friend. To me, my mother will always be my best friend. Though I don't really say this out loud (I'm not much of the hugging type of person or a person, whom the verbal words “I love you” comes easily) but I do love you, ma. I may not say it in words but I hope I say it in my actions.

Thanks for always being our inspiration, for filling us with pride on your achievements, talents and skills, for giving us a memorable childhood (we did not have much, monetary wise, but we had lots of joy and happy memories) and for making us proud to call you, our mother. We're truly blessed to have you in our lives.



4 Responses
  1. Anonymous Says:

    simply lovely!!!
    so so beautiful....


  2. Ameertha Says:

    Thank you.. Thank you for your touching comments..

    My mom is a lovely person, that's for sure.. Lovely, both inside and out.. :)


  3. with an interval break, at last finished reading this beautiful thought...u r lucky to have her as ur mum and she also lucky to have uols in her life...really supportive and caring...i hope uols have a endless happiness with her...i'm touched with this writing and believe ur mum too...happy beday aunty Jacinta


  4. Ameertha Says:

    Hi Pija.. Thanks.. A very long, rambling blog post, huh? I had a lot of things to share so could not stop writing. I'm such a rambler..(cue : embarrassed Smiley)

    Thanks for the kind words.. Nice of you to take the time to comment..

    You're lucky to have such a nice mom too and I'm very sure you are a good mom too to your children.. May you too have happiness always with your family..


    Translation Tool

    Search This Blog

    Welcome

    Rambling Ame is my name for I love to talk and talk and talk.
    In this blog, I offer my views on everything and anything; Movies, Songs, Celebrities, People and life in general.

    My Facebook

    My Twitter

    Follow by Email

    Enter your email address:

    Delivered by FeedBurner

    Followers

    My YouTube

    My Music Videos

    My Other Blog

    Mom's Poetry

    Rambling Posts